Asperger's and Hatred!

Most of my adult life I felt severely empty, and I always needed to do something to help fill my emptiness. I almost always chose to ignore everything and just move about my days and weeks as if nothing was going on but I would always feel in the back of my mind that I did feel sorry for myself big time. Throughout junior high and high school I constantly made mistakes and I rubbed people the wrong way. I had girls take advantage of me and make me feel belittled and smaller in stature than I actually was. My "friends" were not actually my true friends simply because they would root against me in fights and for me to beat someone else up on occasion, to me that wasn't really a friend at all. There was always someone who made me feel badly and put me down and never was truly there for me. I was always bad at the social game, be it in romantic relationships and relationships with every single category of person I've come across in my life. I constantly said something or did something that was out of the norm, and people looked at me as if I was a weirdo who didn't know what I was doing and for that I became consistently isolated. It never failed how often that had occurred and how often it had remained the same. Nobody knew that I was considered different in a medical sense because no one asked, and no one thought of it and they just lumped me into the strange category and left it at that. I guess if they found out now they would definitely understand seeing as how we are much older now, but it still would not excuse the behavior and how they had treated me when I was younger. Besides that I feel good about myself and I am still going through the soul searching phase of life, I thought that phase was over but apparently I am still in it. I still feel like people hate me and that feeling will never fade. With that I will just go with things and try not to remember the past because it brings up a lot of negative memories and stresses me out way too much. I need to focus on the future and the now and hopefully people do not look at me as if I am strange any longer and will just befriend me and make me feel as though I am apart of society. That is really all I want and I think I deserve that much at least...Am I right?